Wow. It's been six months since I was 'here'. Sheesh. A lot has happened but everything is the same: I am off work and feel about the same; I have a definite diagnosis: CFS & FM (Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and Fibromyalgia) and I lost the weight I gained (in case you're keeping track). So...I am about the same as the rest of the planet: I have good days/hours/minutes...I have bad days/hours/minutes. There's many people better off than me...there's many more worse off.

I had an attitude adjustment a few days ago, however, that has had an unexpected affect on me. I was reading the intro of "How to be Sick" by Toni Bernhard & Sylvia Boorstein and realized the author's symptoms are almost exactly the same as mine: widespread weakness and pain; bone-numbing fatigue; headaches.

I might be sick.

I know what you're thinking: being on disability and off work for six months usually hints at an illness of some sort. Ahh...but here's the 'kicker'...I hadn't really ACCEPTED that I was sick. I was still living like a 'well' person in spite of being sick. After I read Bernhard's description, two things happened: one, I realized on a deeper, cellular level that I have a 'condition' that will prevent me from living how I used to live and, two, I may as well get used to it.

Now I feel un-sick.

I have accepted that I will have some issues with living a 'normal' life so I had better get my ass in gear and figure out a new 'normal' way to live for me. My new 'normal' includes taking better care of myself physically, mentally and spiritually. It's not like this is new or profound...isn't this the most common refrain every January 1st? Sounds great in theory but in practice? Not so much.

MY plan includes the following:

- daily yoga
- drinking more green tea than coffee every day
- doing the "Game On" diet with Carmen on June 1st
- eating better, including cutting back on sugar with Ashley
- living more mindfully

I will be going on and on about these things in upcoming posts...stay tuned. :)